Monday, August 25, 2008

And We're Back

Now that the Olympics have been put to bed for another four years I can resume my life and once again return to the things I have to go do; i.e. teach, work, clean the house, shop, the regular stuff. Before I close the Olympiad book for good I would like to say a few things good and bad about the 8 greatest days Beijing has ever seen, aside from Mao you know.
THE GOOD
Michael Phelps was beyond good, beyond great, it was like God made him for one purpose and one purpose only; to kick every one's ASS!!!!! like it had never been kicked before. Gymnastics was pretty damn awesome as well. Sure the Chinese have small preschool aged children competing but I think that only makes it more amazing. I could barley so a somersault at the age of 5 and these girls WOW! that's talent. Diving. I still don't know how they can jump from 3o feet in the air twist like that and not just eat shit when they enter the water Those athletes are remarkable and the sport VERY scary.
THE BAD
The US 4x100 relay team. Sure watching from your couch really makes you the backseat sprinter but come on people. Passing the baton, wasn't that a skill covered in 4th grade gym class. If they fuck up something I can do they are NOT Olympic caliber athletes; I might even call their entire athleticism into question. Additionally, I know that watching Michael Phelps win gold medal number 3,000,000 live is much better that tape delay but when that live coverage is at 2:15 am I start to seriously question how much better it can be. I really do think the IOC owes me about 27 hours of lost sleep during the month of August.
So over all great. I just love the Olympics. The wins by 1/1 gazillionth of a second. Those touching special interest pieces where you cry for that kid who had to sell his kidney just to keep training with the Karolyi gymnastic elite. Even the insane amount of food Michael Phelps eats a day was rather interesting, sick and gross but interesting none the less. My hat is off to you Beijing and 29th Olympiad. With 1.5 billion though you know China was gonna outshine every other Olympics ever, was there even an option. It was there one opportunity to show that having more people in one country than you think humanly possible can actually be an asset; that and if they ever decide to try for world domination.

School starts in a mere 10 hours so off to be I am and will re cap day 1 of a new year tomorrow.
Same bat time same bat channel

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

HIATUS

Due to the once every four year amazement of the Olympics I am taking a hiatus until they are over. I am sorry but I cannot spend every single free moment watching said Olympics and trying to blog. The blog will be here after August 26th the Olympics my friends sadly will not.
In case you want to know what I am watching every free second of my days go to www.nbcolympics.com
Don't worry sports fans I will return soon but in the mean time I ask you this: Is this girl 16 like her "passport" says or 11 like her face says?
I let you be the judge.Hopefully when I return I will have answers but Communist China is rather sneaky.

Thursday, August 7, 2008

I have a dirty little secret to share

I consider myself an intelligent person. I have a college degree, am well read and like to engage in intelligent activities. I even teach history which definitely means I know ALOT about that subject. But there is a secret. Remember that episode of Sex and the City (all hail SJP) in which Carrie discusses secret single behaviors. These are things that women do that they would never do in front of their boyfriend/husband. Things that are guilty pleasures in whihc the woman loves but knows that if this gets out she will be ridiculed by siad man. If you reclall her's was wating sandwiches of white saltines and and grape jelly standing up in her kitchen reading fashion magazines, particuarly Vogue.

Much in the fashion of other single women I too have those SSB's and I fear that I, like Carrie Bradshaw, need to come clean with my SSB. I am obsessed with Tori and Dean: Homem Sweet Hollywood. I cannot get enough of that show. I DVR it so I can watch it when my husband is gone. I read the blog, go on the website and generally obsess over it. Last night with the episode of the birth of thier daughter Stella I was crying, especially over the lame song they sang at the end. Really people this is sad stuff but I love it. I cannot get enough of this show and get VERY upset if I cannot engage in this Secret Single Behavior. I have not yet become one of this crazy people that sends baby gifts go celebrity strangers but it could happen one day. I am even secretly checked out the boot Tori Spelling wrote STori Telling and can't wait to secretly read it!.

So there you have it folks there is my SSB my all comsuming love for the Spelling/McDermot clan. Feel free to share with me your SSB's unless it is Tuesday at 10 then Tori and Dean will be on and I will be engaging in my own SSB and hate to be bothered.

Monday, August 4, 2008

I heard the pool calling to me all day.

Well folks one of the worst days of the years has happened. That day I have dreaded for weeks now. One that I did not want to think about or even admit was quickly approaching. Yes it is that day, the day I had to go back to work. Luckily though it was not teaching per say but rather this pretty cool U.S. History institute I was chosen to be a part of. While I feel that these next two weeks will actually be useful and I will (gasp) get to take material back to my classroom that I can (double gasp) ACTUALLY USE!!!! in general the end of summer SUCKS rocks. The people cool, the grant director cool, the lecturers even cool but couldn't we be doing this work by the pool or even on the grass. Anywhere please besides inside some dull classroom with the AC on full blast, artificial light and windows that DO NOT open. It took all my strength to not leave at lunch and spend my afternoon by the pool.

In a very haters are us type of sentiment I have to hate one some people for a moment or twenty. I HATE, HATE, HATE, when people raise their hand to ask lecturers a question when really all they want to do is espouse their stupid rhetoric and show off to everyone else how learned they are. I especially hate it when their perceived GENIUS comment has really nothing at all to do with the lecture and they are invariably wrong. In case you couldn't tell by my ranting this happened to me today. In my institute I am attending every morning of the the University professors lectures to the group about a topic in US history. They are usually experts in their topic, very engaging and you learn a lot. There is always a Q and A session and most people ask good questions where they want clarification, to get more info or whatever. This morning though 2 people asked a "question" and then rambled on for, I kid you not, 10 minutes about nothing. Ans what was especially horrible was that their nothing was a wrong nothing and the professor kept having to correct their inaccurate information.
Personally there is NOTHING more I hate than stupid people trying to pretend that they are smart and in doing so expose their severe ineptitude and pompousness at at once. First off if you want to espouse your bullshit craptastic rhetoric then become a god damned college professor. Second, and more importantly I might add, if you are going to ramble on for 15 minutes and waste all our time then at least be right about the information you are boring us to death with.
All in all an okay day but laying at the pool would have been better, especially since there would be no stupid people cramming their inaccurate bullshit down my ever annoyed throat!

Friday, August 1, 2008

Facebook the 10 year Reunion of the 21st Century

As I laid by the pool this afternoon catching up on my tanning and thinking about a whole lot of nothing I realized that I am getting old and that a true sign of that is my 10 year high school reunion will be next year. Ten years! F*ck where has the time gone, have I really become an adult where not so long a go my biggest concern was what friend was coming over to hang out.
Over the years my friends and I have debated going to our ten year reunion. There are a group of about 5 of us that have stayed super close since high school and everyone else has seemed to fade.
People that, at the time I enjoyed talking to, drinking with, and trying to go on a date with but does that mean I really want to see them now. And furthermore do I want to actually have to talk with them and listen to their endless dribble about a life I know nothing of and frankly don't care about.
I want to go for the reasons why everyone else wants to go. I want to snoop. I want the gossip. I want all the goods without all the chit-chat See who has improved since high school and who hasn't, who has become a loser and who, against all odds made it big.
As I was thinking about these things I realized I have already attended my high school reunion and even better I didn't have talk to any of them to find out the gossip I wanted. All I had to do was look them up on facebook, ask to be their friend, wait for them to say yes (everyone says yes) and viola instant reuion. Facbook gives you all the information that you want at a reuion. Pictures of them as the ten years have either given them money to get plastic surgery or shown that yes metabolism slows and they have have gained weight. It gives you that one vital stastic, single or in a relationship. It tells you some other things you may care about job, interests, and most importantl the wall where you can read all their posts from their real frinds to get the dirt on their lives without ever having to talk to them ONCE!!! Also you can see their friends which is a gold mind for other ex high school buddies you also want to snoop on. Now if you really want to maxamize it get together with the friends from high school you actually see and care about and swap usernames and passwords so you can see exponentialy more old acquaintences without bweing one of those freaky people with like 1,000 friends.
Thak you Facebook. With you I can go to my high school reunion in my jamies and unwashed hair, learn the gossip on everyone withoth ever having to open my mouth and the best part call my real high school friends and gossip in person to them about the LOSERS our high school acquaintences became.